Saturday, June 27, 2020

You Can't Sleep It Away

I woke from a stupor, an almost six hours of sleep in the daytime.  I find it very strange.  I woke this morning at about 6:15.  I watched the news for a little while, felt sleepy, and went back in the bed at about 7:30 forcing myself out at 8 to get ready for an 8:30 yoga class.  I blamed it on the impending weather – rainstorm (which never came, unless it did while I was sleeping).  Sleeping for six hours during the day is quite unusual, three hours maybe, but not six. 

What can I attribute it to?  Weather?  Had that reaction earlier that morning – I can understand tiredness, low feeling, a nap, but not six hours.  Food?  I ate leftovers of my own home-cooked meal, eaten the day before with no reaction.  Physical tiredness?  Haven’t done anything physical except for the yoga class – that can’t be it.  Missed sleep?  Slept well the night before. 

It has been a draining three and a half months since my brush with COVID-19, followed by the tragedy of George Floyd.  COVID-19 has not fully left me.  I still at times experience loss of taste, no appetite for food, lethargy, chills and breathing issues.  Sometimes, I feel it in my eyes.   Others have noticed my eyes, too.  COVID is like Shingles in that sense, where it takes forever to leave you.  After having Shingles in 2013, I continued to feel pain in my shoulder blade ever so often and for quite a few years.  It is my hope that COVID-19 goes away and soon.

But what about the strain and drain of racism.  It takes a toll on the mind and body.  I am educating myself more through books.  Just before going to bed, I had been reading Ibram X. Kendi’s “How to Become An Antiracist.”  I have also been reading slave narratives.  These are difficult and I cry for my ancestors.  I am learning about the sodomization of slaves in front of wives, children and anyone and everyone, and in particular in Jamaica and the reason behind Jamaica being number one against homosexuality.  I am also reading about modern day slavery in the South. 

Did I sleep six hours to sleep away the pain?


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